FEEDBACK #2

So much to like in this scene: the isolated atmosphere, the contrast between the comic victim and the serious murderer. The humour’s great to make us like the victim and feel something when we understand his fate.

My only suggestion is if there is someway to signal that the bartender has selected him? Was he doomed before the scene even began, or could he do/say something that makes the murderer say to themselves “tonight, I kill again”?

Video artist working at The New York Times. I write a weekly newsletter about visual storytelling and creativity. https://adamwestbrook.substack.com/